WordTapestry

shared pains I burned my hand  once on the stove,  burned it badly and the sting bit down  to the bone. But when  you came rushing  to my side, I sucked in a breath and pretended  that everything was fine-- not because of any lost  pride, rather, I just didn't want to see you cry over  the hurt that I blindly called mine. 

Growing apart You came up to me  yesterday, sipping your tea, and asked me  what I'd been up to  recently. I brushed you off with a smile, said that nothing interesting had happened in a while.  You nodded, picked at an imaginary hangnail while I furrowed my brow and pretended to peruse through the mail.   Not looking up, I wondered when we had grown so  awkward and apart when we used to be intertwined,  two beings of one heart and mind. 

remnants some days, our memories hug me from behind. other times, they come for my neck, and I think I'd let them strangle me first before I risk forgetting the remnants of you.

Not quite right. Once in a while, I will lay out your old clothes on my bed  the way you would have  worn them,  with the sleeves of your sweatshirt pulled up tight,  and your socks  forgetfully mismatched --not quite right.  And if I try hard enough  to believe,  as I bury my face  deep into  your imaginary chest  and breathe in  that lingering scent,  you will be right there  beside me. 

Eternal Tonight we are together on a boat in some distant cove  whose name I cannot remember.  The sea is pacified for now, it  seems, as no creatures churn at its deep blue waters--the time is  ripe for you and I to drift  aimlessly beneath this silent sky. Tonight we are alone and though it's just us riding atop  the gentle waves, though the sun has  set, leaving us safe in its shade-- something still holds us back  from acknowledging the weight  of our hopeful, hopeless hearts.  Tonight we are united helplessly, just two lovesick fools in misery. Even when my pulse thuds with the beat of your footsteps and your  delicate fingers never stray from my arm, you look up toward the  heavens as I stare at the sea--our little intricacies tearing us apart  like so many hidden scars.  But painful as we are, two dreamers brought so near and held so far, I am  content to stay like this forever,  because tonight, the ...

Text Me (or Not) Your speech bubble  wavers and then disappears  as I whisper fiercely in  Caps Lock all my secrets to your waiting ears. And to my great dismay, the few times when you do care to stay,  you only respond in crude  type, not bothering to  backspace the dirty words  that you claim to be right. Please, if you are to be so rude, just  ghost me next time--let me  know that you are not the one  that I should choose. 

Starry Sea          The waters were calm one night, much to the pleasure of the Moon; for that night, her pale reflection slit open the black sea--that night she could admire herself in all her glory.      Perhaps it was her fortune, perhaps it was magic. Because the Sea was never calm for long--no, his temper had long since gained him infamy. He who wore down miles of rock, who levelled the earth, who drowned fleets of men at a whim! But that evening, he settled down--for what was perhaps the first time in centuries.  And not even the largest fish in the sea dared to breathe--to stir the pot and risk a storm. Not a creature was in sight, except for the tiny boat and its master drifting aimlessly across the silky waves.       Hidden by curtains of dark, a fisherman was slumped aboard, pining and hoping for something more. He already had more than what millions of other earthlings could claim, but he did not realize it. He...

Reminisce You're gonna miss this, I often say when I am kissed by joy. And while  it's true that I often ache for those old times, as I take  a look outside and notice the beauty in the grey skies,  I think that I'd prefer to live in the inbetween than be  constantly, irrevocably happy.

Records Won't you spin  me around like one of your old records,  so that we can twirl together for a minute or maybe forever, with all our bright colors  blurring into one and  your face buried deep into my sweater. Hand in hand, let's dance like  we aren't tethered--though there's a big world out there waiting, let's dance like it doesn't matter. 

Paper crane This paper crane  with its crumpled wings is overburdened by  everything--the vastness of the canyon he  must brave below, the  prospect of his future  happiness being a no-show.  All my dreams are inscribed upon his feathers, puffing him up at the seams with hope,  but his edges have been torn in anger--so slumped painfully, he can only mope.  And no matter how hard  he tries, though he is  plagued by my everlasting sighs, this paper crane  of mine will never be able to fly.

                                                                                    Rain ​You didn’t answer when I called out your name.   When I went  to look outside, I  found you sitting on the front porch,  staring out into  the  afternoon rain.  You  smiled  when you saw me,  dark eyes  crinkling beautifully. Wordlessly, I sat down by your feet. Time can wait. Today I just want to watch the storm with you.

                                                         Won't you fly me to the moon? When I was small, you would tell me stories into the early hours of the morning because I was afraid of the dark. I loved you so much that I pretended to be scared—years later, even when I had lost my fear, just to keep you by my side.  You should have scolded me for clinging so tightly to your frail bones, but you didn't. Sometimes, I blame you for that. I wish you had pushed me away. I wish you had acted a stranger. You should have broken my heart with a quick, decisive blow. But you didn't.  One tale that you always loved was the one about the rabbit on the Moon—a story about a creature who was so selfless he would rather hurt himself than witness a stranger's suffering. Looking back, it was fitting, I suppose. You, ...

Avoidant My lungs shudder and my feet are numb, but still, I run even when I can't remember why,  all I know is that I feel  terrified. Whatever is  chasing me is long behind me, hidden in the  dust I have stirred up  in my wake--perhaps this is  all just a big mistake and  there was nothing hunting me down in the first place. Yes, maybe there are no other competitors in this senseless  race, but I am not one to take  chances, so I will maintain my  stance and keep running until  I can no longer stand upright. 

deleted messages  I feel so tired and small today. Are you still there  on the other end?  I don't want to pretend anymore.  I'm not sure what  I did wrong, but I'm  sorry. Can we stop being angry at each other?  Talk to me, curse at me, do whatever you desire,  just stop leaving me  on read, please.  This cold war is killing me.  When are you coming home tonight? Make it sometime soon, so far I've microwaved dinner  at least ten times over  for you. It's cold outside,  remember to wear your scarf! No, I don't feel like going to the recital. Can't we stay?  Have you eaten yet? I don't say it enough, but I love you, I really do. Some days I just feel  too hopeless to prove it to you.  I don't remember if  I told you this before, but  you really are the bravest person I know. When are you coming  back home?

Burnt-Out My head is a candle  lit aflame.  Hot wax oozes down from my crown  to my face  like so many burning, reeking tears,  searing angry red tracks  into my cheeks. Any moment now,  the fire will catch on to you,  and still you stand here,  hands cupped over  my dying flame,  because my warmth  is all you have these empty days. And though your eyes  are watering  with the acrid smoke, though the odor of charred skin  swims down your throat,  somehow, you uphold  that the mess I am is sweet,  even as you look at me so tentatively,  because all you really  want to see is my light,  however fleeting it may be. 

In Limbo Whenever I talked  with you, my heart was perched on the edge of  my tongue, contemplating  whether or not to take  the chance and fall, but like the coward I was, I swallowed it down each time and tried not to mind the taste of  blood lingering in my mouth.  Now, I think the saddest  thing of all is how you never  knew that out of every person in the room, you would forever be the only one that I would  choose. 

Long Way Why don't we take the long way home?  I have so much to  tell you, so much I want you to know. And  won't you hold my hand  as we cross the street,  hoping against hope that  our day would never  meet an end...today was  much too quiet and still,  so let's make a ruckus of the night, and maybe we can share a dance on the edge of the crosswalk, under the glow of the  amber streetlight.

Crownless Your hair is a bird's nest  of fluff  not fit  for a crown,  and your hands  are far too fidgety  to hold a scepter-- but your chin is bold  and never tilted down, your very presence commands, and your watchful eyes  can condemn  without a sound.  You are an enigma;  that much is true,  but I think I can understand  why they say  you are a king, but with a crownless rule.